November 23, 2005
Feast and Football
After 10 hours of travel and a full day’s rest (16 hours of sleep) it is official, I am back in Chattanooga for Thanksgiving. Praise God! My very wonderful and kind Flight Attendant Sugarmomma Friend hooked me up with a free plane ticket on Southwest, and I am presently recuperating at Skip’s house till my fam arrives. I did have dinner last night with David and Apryl. It was nice to see them and as usual it was good times. :) This is the first time in almost 2 years that I have been back in the South and I have missed it! I have especially missed Chattanooga. I did my undergrad at UTC and lived here for 6 ½ years, and it is still very much a part of home for me.
Any way, like I said, I am spending Thanksgiving here. In fact, it is not jus me but all of my mom’s side of the family. It will be nice to see my family. There will be about 17 of us and we are renting a couple of houses on the Tennessee River just on the other side of down town. It will be great! There is even a hot tub, which is very exciting! :)
If you live here in Chattanooga and I haven’t called you to say hi, sorry :( Health will not allow me to get out but please know that I wish I could! I hope you have a wonderful Thanksgiving and things are not too hectic.
I’m going to take a nap so I can enjoy the feast and football tomorrow!
Y’all have a good’in!
LJ
Here are some pictures of my flight from Chicago. I took it with my little pinhole digital camera.
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November 17, 2005
article
For those interested in urban preservation and renewal this is an interesting article. The web magazine Architecture Weekly is one worth checking out.
LJ
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November 16, 2005
Wedgie
Confusion… It’s like a wedgie in my mind! I have thoughts and feelings I long to express, but today, like others, it just is not happening. I can get by in ways so that those around me can not pick up on it. But those closest to me know and are patient.
I wish I could be patient too. I get frustrated! The frustration makes it worse. It becomes more difficult! The words, though somewhat complete in the back of my mind, dissipate as they reach the front and escape through my mouth. At this point they more describe than explain.
I am thankful for close friends. They encourage me and remember who I am and what I am like. They remind me of that when I forget and become frustrated. They know what I mean and lovingly and warmly ask questions to help me clarify. Best of all, they get excited with me over the things they and I delight in. :) That’s what community does isn’t it. God loves us and shows us grace. He fixes our brokenness. Therefore we are able to strive to not only live together in love and grace, but also remind each other that these things are true. Even when they don’t feel that way and even when we can’t articulate them.
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November 10, 2005
community 1 A
It’s late Wednesday night and I can’t sleep because of the pain. I have a disease called Fibromyalgia. It is an autoimmune disease that is caused by my immune system getting turned on for the purpose of fighting the flue or something and for some messed up reason it didn’t turn off. Because of this I tend to have extreme pain of various degrease in my legs and in my back. Some times it travels to my arms but that is usually rare. Any way, I am awake and I am thinking. This usually doesn’t mean a whole lot because my wonderfully fun ADD mind on little sleep doesn’t have very coherent thoughts… though they usually are a butt lode of fun! :) Any way, I am thinking about community.
Those of you who are observant fellows, or fellowesess (is that a word?) will notice that the word community is part of the descriptor in my blog title… Good for you! :) This four-word description, Community, Grace, Feasting, & Whisky, derives its self (more by illustration of practical application than any thing else) from a structure that I believe is fundamental to being whole persons. Any way, I ramble… :) Community. It’s a great word. In fact, it’s a buzzword for my generation. We long for it. We long to know and be known. To be authentic (another of my generation’s buzz words) and relevant in other people’s lives, and for them to be authentic and relevant in ours. Here’s the thing I am convicted about though. It is one thing to desire and say this and it is another thing to live it out! If you don’t believe me then try it. After the romantic courting stage is done, reality opens up and the hardness comes on. This is not bad hardness though. It is good stuff. After all, what is worthwhile is difficult!… Again, I am rambling… What I was thinking about community (by community I mean those who have chosen to live in emotionally close and committed relationship with each other, not necessarily the people living in your specific local, though they are part of your community too) was the necessity of risking hope and the often paralyzing fear in doing so.
We are not meant to be alone. We are made for relationship. The difficulty, or at least part of the difficulty, is what I cal the “Cool Kid Factor.” We all want to be the cool kid who has it all together. They always know what to say, are always wise and don’t make mistakes, can handle any trial that comes their way, always knows what to do and does it, and even in their weakness they have it all together. We all want this. We want to pretend that we are not broken. But we are! We are all broken people. It is in the admission of shortcomings, fears, longings, and desires to each other that we are able to struggle together and support and encourage one another. It is in community that we are able to stand through the crap of brokenness, know who others and ourselves are, and experience the gloriousness of being human.
This sounds great but what does it mean? Alot of it means active vulnerability, trust, and humility on all of our parts. This is not only being willing to honestly stand beside people but also being honestly willing to let people stand beside us! To not only ask people to trust us, but to folow through with that trust and alow ourselves to trust them. To flush this out further, it means partnering with people and letting people partner with us in wrestling through the questions, fears, dreams, doubts, sorrows, and joys we have. It means risking hope.
I say risking hope because that’s what it is. It is accepting the risk of actively hoping, even in the midst of fear of failure and/or rejection. This is scary but necessary in community. Otherwise we just end up throwing platitudes at each other. True community wmust be committed to each other beyond convenience. Even when there is fear, failure, hardship, and suffering true community is faithful to each other. This is a lot of responsibility and it is not to say that we will not let each other down. In fact, if we are honest, we know that we will let each other down, but that is not an excuse to not pursue each othe. By risking vulnerability community becomes a safe place for us and others to just be, forgive each other, and love and care for each other.
This is not to say that we should not use wisdom and that community is the end all be all of human existence, but it is definitely a crucial aspect of it. Even though it is hard to remember that it is ok and good for us to risk, it is also good for us to remind each other that it is both safe and necessary.
Well, it’s late (2:52 AM on Thursday) and I am nodding off. I need to go to bed so that by Friday I can be fit enough to babysit my favorite one year old. :) Have a great day today and respond if you like.
LJ
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November 02, 2005
And so it begins…
After much thought I have decided to start a Blog. I have a great deal of hesitancy in dong this because there is a great deal of pressure in taking on such a task. It requires faithfulness, diligence, and responsibility. This may lead you to ask, “Well Lloyd, why do it?” I’m glad you asked such a great question. J I guess the best way to answer it is by setting out the purpose for my Blog. It is not meant to be profound or enlightening. It has no hidden agenda and is not meant to be an example of perfect spelling or grammar. It is simply an interaction with life and reality. It is a way to stay in contact with friends and loved ones, express thoughts, desires, and observations, learn how to love people better, explore questions and interest, think about God, engage culture, show pictures, talk about movies, art, business, houses, and life, build and strengthen relationships, talk about my day, practice hospitality, learn, read, communicate, and laugh. I appreciate any jokes, comments, snide remarks, and pointless ramblings. My commitment is to try to be as honest and authentic as possible with the recognition that this is at times difficult over the median of a Blog (often times we as people, accidentally and/or intentionally, portray ourselves as we would like to be seen rather than as we are). I also commit to trying to post at least twice a week, respond to comments when needed, and update my layout just to keep things interesting. There it is folks. I hope you enjoy.
LJ
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